This week has been a hum dinger!

Gilda's Club is an organization here in Grand Rapids (and several other cities in the US) founded by Gilda Radner of SNL fame, who lost her battle with cancer in 1989. It's an absolutely gorgeous old farmstead that has been remodeled into a cancer support center for patients, their families and friends. When it first opened I was a excited supporter, now, unfortunately, I'm a client. What a godsend it was to go there for dinner and attend a support group last night. This week has taken a huge toll. 

The roller coaster week of challenging test results and crummy side effects began with my CAT scan findings. It showed 4 nodules on my left lung and a cyst on my kidney. My new Physician's Assistant, Kim, another member of my growing "team", tells me the nodules are of unknown origin so they want to schedule another CAT scan in two months to measure the nodules again. If they have grown, she will order a biopsy to evaluate them for cancer cells. That news made for a challenging Monday. 

On Tuesday I was just trying to hang on. My incisions continued to be painful and fester and it felt like my brain was doing the same. Finally, in the evening, I got some good self talk going and the cheerleader was back!  I decided to just focus on the fact that Wednesday would be a better day and I was going to spend it with my favorite two year old! About two minutes into our snuggle I got a call from another doctor telling me my mammogram results were in and there is a suspicious mass in my left breast. 

Several people encouraged me the day before saying its a good sign that they weren't rushing to do a biopsy of the lung. Wednesday when I shared that they were getting me in right away on Thursday to do a repeat mammogram and ultrasound those same folks said, "oh good, what a relief that they are taking this seriously and are seeing you right away."  And I was trying to feel the same way, but honestly all I could think was f~<£!!

So yesterday I spent the day at the cancer center having my incisions checked, putting the details together so that next week's surgery will go more smoothly than last week's, and finding out whether or not I also have breast cancer. I knew they ordered the initial mammogram because there seems to be a correlation between women who get melanoma multiple times and those same women being diagnosed with breast cancer. Thankfully I left the center knowing that the mass was a 3 cm benign cyst. It doesn't need to be removed. It won't ever develop into cancer. Finally a test result ultimately going my way!!!

Then I got to end the day at Gilda's Club with my sister Christine, who had been on the roller coaster with me all day. Thank you family and friends for all your visits, calls, cards, words of encouragement and thoughts of hope. I'll never forget your support. Every word means the world to me. I love you all so much. 

cancer: watch out, it's unruly

Been dealing with a few rough and unexpected weeks. In the middle of April, my dermatologist referred me to a surgical oncologist when two tumors she biopsied turned out to be malignant melanoma. My oncologist decided she wanted to remove 4 additional spots and have them evaluated. 

So last Monday I had two softball sized excisions and 4 golfball sized sections of skin removed at Butterworth Hospital. Two days later I was told that all 4 additional spots came back as cancerous too. So now I need another surgery where they softball size cut the old golfball scars, taking away any other cancer and a sizable margin of healthy skin. 

Unfortunately, the test results also show that the cancer is aggressive and growing fast and kind of wild so during the next surgery they are "softballing" ( my technical term)  two more sections of skin because they have spots that look awfully similar to, and as unusual as, the other cancerous tumors. That surgery was supposed to be this coming Monday but as of today, all of my current scars are painful and oozing and infected so I've started a round of antibiotics and am taking medication for the pain for 10 days until it's safe for the dr to cut into me again. 

Therefore my next surgery, which will result in 6 additional softball sized scars, will be Thursday, May 29. Three of the excisions will be on my right shoulder/midback area, two will be on my left side and one on my right. They warn me that it will continue to be impossible to use my right arm and very difficult to find a comfortable position. :(

I've also had blood work, EKGs, pathology reports, a mammogram and tomorrow is a full body CT scan- We want to be positive that no cancer had spread into other organs. 

I covet your love and support, your comments, questions and suggestions. The last thing my dr said to me today is that I have many surgeries in my future and a long road ahead.

Sounds pretty painful, lonely and daunting. I'm going to have to do something about that! Calling all cheerleaders!!